Actually this is something I´m asking my self right now. My baby is now 13 months old and the idea of making our family bigger is very tempting. I´ve been gathering lost of info about it. I´ll share it with you. You may know what to expect but still...
For many people the decision to have another child is more about when than whether. And plenty wonder if there's an ideal spacing between children - for the adults and the kids. The big question: Is it best to have children one right after the other so they can play together and you can get all your child rearing done in the shortest time, or is it better to put some distance between the kids?
Here's a rundown of the studies on ideal baby spacing:
Waiting 18 to 23 months after the birth of your last child before conceiving another seems best for the new baby's health, according to a recent study published in the New England Journal of Medicine. What should I consider when making the decision?
How old is your other child (or children)?
There is no right or wrong answer here, though it seems clear from the research above that it wouldn't be wise to get pregnant if you're the parent of a child under 6 months. People go both ways on this question. Some think the older your other children, the better. That way they've had plenty of time with you and they can understand and even talk about the effect another child might have. Others think spacing your children close together ensures they'll be playmates for life, and that you won't be spending the rest of your life raising small children.
How will another child change your lifestyle?
Are you settled into a nice routine with your other children? Do you have a good childcare system set up?
Is everyone else finally sleeping through the night? Perhaps you've gotten to the point where you and your
partner have time for each other again. Maybe you've gone back to work and you love it. These are all important considerations when you're thinking of having another. Remember, a newborn will take over your life. Consider whether you have the time and energy an infant requires, and whether your children are ready to deal with the reality of a baby in the house. You may end up deciding that one is enough.
Unfortunately age is a factor, especially for women. If you're 38 years old and you want two more, you don't have the luxury of spacing them three years apart. But if you're under 30, and you don't have any health problems that could make conception difficult, you can be a little more flexible with your timing. There are no hard and fast cutoffs in terms of age. Many women can still get pregnant in their early 40s, but fertility rates do drop dramatically once you reach 35.
Everyone needs to have their health checked out preconceptionally. This is true, even if you’ve had a baby before. Things to be sure to address would be any chronic conditions you’ve had like thyroid issues, high blood pressure or diabetes and be sure that they are in control before attempting to conceive. Also be sure to discuss other health concerns.
Are you economically ready to handle a new baby and everything that comes with it? From maternity leave to day care, it can get expensive. Hopefully you can save some money by reusing items from your first including baby clothes, maternity clothes and big ticket items. You may also look at the benefits of staying home on your finances as child care for more than one can add up.
Do you and your partner agree?
Sometimes one partner is ready and the other isn't. It's hard to be in sync all the time. This is a tough one to settle, but the first step is to start talking about your differences. Sit down together and discuss your points of view. You may not solve anything at that moment, but you'll have a better understanding of the issues. It might help to talk to others in this situation, too.
What does your heart say?
Sure, you can sit down with a big legal pad and run through the pluses and minuses of having another child. But this is one of those decisions that's led by the heart, so go ahead and follow yours. If you want another baby, and your partner (if you have one) wants one too, there may be no time like the present. •Evaluate your practitioner from your last birth.
If you had a positive birth experience and what to have a similar experience you will probably not need to do much research or changing. However, if you’d like something different, you may need to find a new doctor or midwife or switch hospitals or other birth settings.